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January 15, 2004
New From America's Most Trusted Hysteria Source
The hype-mongers at CNN are always keen to highlight minimal dangers that paranoid people may not have been aware of. Today, they scraped hard and deep into the bottom of the post-9-11 anxiety barrel and found a few more "experts" who are sounding the alarm about the few remaining rigid items that Americans are allowed to carry aboard commercial airliners.
The story first quotes Michael Boyd, an airline industry analyst. In a rare and probably unintentional moment of clarity, the story describes Boyd as being "fixated on pointy objects." The intensive and invasive screening of airline passengers is practically for naught, according to Boyd, because the TSA still hasn't adopted his recommendation to subject airline mechanics and baggage handlers to body cavity searches when they arrive for work each day.
Commercial pilot Fred Bates was alarmed by the fact that "an elderly passenger was holding a cane" on his flight, reaffirming his belief that the day he is properly trained to pack heat in his cockpit can't come soon enough.
Equally amusing are the insights of MIT professor Theodore Postol. I remember taking Professor Postol's class on weapons systems when I was an undergraduate. Specifically, I remember that he rarely showed up to deliver his lectures because he was too busy delivering inflammatory quotes to the media regarding his research into the effectiveness of the Patriot missle system in the first Gulf War. Postol sees an immediate and pressing need to install biometric sensors on the aircraft controls so that only authorized pilots could control the plane. To place his ideas in context, I also feel compelled to share the fact that he once mentioned during a lecture that his house was rigged with motion sensors because he believed that Raytheon and the Department of Defense were trying to have him killed.
I, for one, applaud the efforts of our nation's cranks, fuss-budgets and fear-mongers to make air travel an experience so devoid of risk that no ordinary person will ever have the patience to jump through the hoops. Only by arming our pilots, keeping the elderly off of planes and making it impossible for passengers to fly the plane can we prevent a tragedy like this one from ever happening again.
Posted by Dan at January 15, 2004 03:47 PM
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